When tomorrow starts without me and I am not there, when the sun should rise and seek your eyes that are filled with tears for me, I wish you wouldn’t cry. I wish you wouldn’t cry while you think of all the things we didn’t get to say and do and the guilt you feel.

I know how much you love me, I know how you’ll miss me because I feel the same way, I am loosing you too. But when tomorrow starts without me and the sun rises please try to understand, I never wanted to leave you, I wasn’t ready and neither were you.

I wasn’t ready to leave you behind and all those I love so dearly, but while I was forced to walk away I want you to know a tear slipped from my eye, not so you feel sad just to know I truly wanted to stay and this goodbye hurts me too. I didn’t want to leave you there.

I didn’t want to go.

I was too young to die. I had so much to live for, so much to do. Even now, it almost seems impossible that I am leaving you tonight. As I thought of all the things I would miss come tomorrow, my heart fills with sorrow. I thought of Key, Taemin and Onew, I thought of SHINee, of my family, of my friends.

I thought about how they still needed me, I thought of all the things I’d never get to do, things I’ll never get to see and say but most of all I thought of you.

The angel took my hand again and whispered to me, “it’s time”.

I cried.

I wish I could tell you I forgive you, I don’t hate you for what you did and said; I know, Jonghyun I know and its ok. I forgive you.

I wish I could tell you.

When tomorrow starts without me, when the sun rises and I am not there, when your tears fall and I can’t wipe them away know this:

I love you, Jonghyun

Always and forever.

And with one last shaky broken whisper of  “Jonghyun” Choi Minho of SHINee at the tender age of 22 died.

 While a few miles away a young man woke to the sound of a phone ringing and the early dawn sun shining on his face.